(Source: pootlord, via pizzaforpresident)
My little corner of the internet
1430His palms are sweaty, knees weak
arms spaghetti
there’s vomit on spaghetti already
mom’s spaghetti
He’s nervous, but on the surface he looks calm spaghetti
to drop bombs
but he keeps on spaghetti
(Source: dysphoriadaughter, via king-muggins)
my life goal is to buy out an entire concert and then the artist will come on stage so dramatically and it will just be me sitting there like
(Source: tridant, via sharonosbourne)
me trying to read fanfiction
‘she tripped, but a pair of strong arms grabbed hold of her from behind before she hit the floor’
‘…she tilted her head back to look into his eyes, enjoying the feel of his warm arms wrapped around her torso’
‘…her hands intertwined behind his neck as their lips met’
‘…she wrapped her legs around his waist as
omgfgfh
(via pizzaforpresident)
Today my mom wasn’t home, so my eight year old sister asked me to set some words for her so she could write her daily sentences. I knew she did them every day, but I’ve never bothered to read them before.
My sister is a lot of things. She’s extremely smart, fairly quiet, and absolutely hilarious. But today I learned two new things about her:
a) my sister does not have a way with the written word
b) my sister is addicted to crack cocaine
I don’t know what the fuck she’s smoking but I want in on it sweet baby jesus I did not know what to do with myself while I was reading some of these
what is wrong with her
I don’t even understand what some of these mean
(things you should know: I am natalie, and her “silkys” are two little silk & velveteen blankets she’s slept with since she was born.)
i rare when im on the toilet.
i am beginning to be a horse
(via pizzaforpresident)
(Source: aliquidstate, via pizzaforpresident)
(via pizzaforpresident)
| Kelly Clarkson: | since u been gone ive gained 70 pounds |
|---|
HHFHbhsbhHRE’ BSH NB O BGG
WHE BGBH WHRTE B B
H BGHFL OJHTB HEIJ EY DZS
OHohHHGNBO BHHBTU H BLSON KBHLEI
UID TIH B EHFV NBEB KNWOE TJ ????
C HRI SBT
(Source: poachy, via sharonosbourne)
![collegehumor:
Oddly Named Butter Substitutes
So, wait, it’s not butter?
[via]](http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m3tc73K1T21qasthro1_500.jpg)
Space Ghost commands Thom to write a hit song about a knife.
(Source: atomsforpeacenik, via king-muggins)
Shout out to Draw Something for fucking up and making me start a new account
